50 Over 50 Project For 2021
Seeker, Counselor, and Creator
"Let go of the expectations of others."
What is the best thing about being your age?
Freedom. Time – my time is totally my own to do with as I choose. Economic – while we aren’t rich, we are comfortable and have saved enough that we don’t have to worry. Concern about what others think of me which leaves me free to take more risks.
What hardships have you endured that you feel have made you stronger?
The death of my father when I was an infant left our family vulnerable financially and me vulnerable emotionally and physically to childhood abuse. I learned to work hard, be thrifty, and save. I also sought help in my 20’s which continues today, for recovery from those early traumas. I continue to heal, moving toward standing firmly in my own wholeness.
What's your favorite thing you have checked off your bucket list?
The cross-country trip with my husband. We visited the heartland of America. Some of the highlights were the Blue Ridge Mountains, Nashville and the Grand Ole Opry and Museum of Country Music, the National Civil Rights Museum at the Laraine Motel and Graceland in Memphis, the Grand Canyon and Salt Lake City. We visited 10 capitol buildings and 7 National Parks.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
My daughter and our relationship. Learning to take care of myself emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and finally physically. I’ve learned to appreciate my body and how to take care of it by doing yoga and learning to eat what my body wants.
What is your most treasured possession?
My relationship with God and my relationship with myself, especially my health, which is intimately tied to that.
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
My life in Aptos, or what I call paradise. The gift of my close, healthy, immediate family. My handful of treasured friends that have walked and continue to travel this journey with me called life. Having financial security.
What is your greatest fear?
Natural disaster – mostly earthquakes, but now fire.
Losing my spouse or daughter.
What is a trait you are most proud of?
Commitment to my relationship with God, myself, and others.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My tendency toward critical judgement of myself and others.
what is your greatest extravagance?
My fashion doll collection.
What do you most value in your friends?
Acceptance and Respect. Being seen and heard.
What advice would you give your younger self?
Don’t spend so much time being concerned about finding a lasting relationship. Don’t worry about taking care of other people’s feelings.
What is your motto or favorite quote?
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” – Marianne Williamson
Words of wisdom for younger women
Let go of the expectations of others.